Reldo writes:
I recently discovered this interesting folk tale in my library archives.
I consider it a fine example of early 5th age Romanticism, and have reproduced it here for the enjoyment of others.

Saga of the Antihero - by Gen Crunchy
Birthright
 |
his story tells the tale of the antihero, the person who got it all... nearly.
Now let us silence, and hear the saga of the antihero... |
Suddenly there was a light, and, after his eyes had adjusted to that
strange new sensation, a town appeared before him, a town dominated by a
grand castle, with a few little buildings hidden in the castle's
shadow.
Disoriented, our antihero looked at a sign, saying "Lumbridge general
store". As his mind raced to grasp what had happened, a text in the
corner of his eye grabbed his attention, it stated "welcome to
Runescape".
Runescape, could this be the name of that strange new world? but how did
he get here? would this be life, about which he knew so much? but how
did he knew? he couldn't remember anything before that light...
He woke out of his pondering when someone called to him, "hey noob, move
it". Puzzled he stepped aside for a knight, or so it appeared, in
sparkling, sky-blue armour, a grand shining sword dangling at his side.
As the knight passed, a rich purple cloak was revealed, dancing on the
lively steps of the knight.
With this image still burning on his retina, our antihero thought:
"that's what I want to be". And so he set out on his quest to seek the
reason of his existence, indeed, his birthright in that grand new world,
Runescape.
First Steps
 |
he antihero's first steps were towards that grand castle, surely he could find a helping hand there.
He had been right, the first person he spoke to turned out to be the
governor, and he was as helpful as to tell him that mining and smithing
were quick and easy ways to earn some hard needed coin. So it came that
our antihero took his trusty pick, of which only Saradomin knows how it
had gotten in his pocket, and set out to crush some rock. |
This was the time that rocks were still hard, and obtaining ore still
took several hits. but after a long and rewarding day of work, he
carried a small collection of self-made daggers and hatchets, wrought
with blood, sweat and tears. The local arms dealer of Varrock was so
kind as to pay a good price for these daggers, and our antihero found
himself in possession of his first gold coins! Of course these coins
were savoured, and safely stored in the reliable safes of the Bank of
Varrock.
More of these days followed, and our antihero became more proficient. He
soon crafted more and more of his equipment until one day he laid down
his hammer, sighed in relief, and tried on his masterpiece: bronze
plate. Our antihero now walked around in what is called "full bronze".
Our antihero was then eager to try out the fruit of his labours, and
sought an appropriate opponent.
The battle against the evil rats populating the sewers was hard, but in
the end our antihero emerged, hands shed in rat blood, armour dented on
al sides, his own blood dripping from a nasty gap in his forehead, but
wiser, stronger and more experienced.
On that day, our antihero had set his first steps on the path that would
lead him further than he had dared dream. A path of hard work, of
complex mysteries, grand battles, but most of all, well earned
experience.
Growing and Integrating
 | ur
hero kept growing more experienced, in crafting armour and weapons, in
slaying the doers of evil, and even in the fine arts of the kitchen, for
it gave him great delight to sit down after a harsh battle and enjoy a
good meal. |
This advancing of our antihero was noticed by other people, who sought
his help, and rewarded him greatly every time he slew an evildoer,
retrieved a prized artefact, or just did the groceries. Through this,
slowly but surely his reputation grew and grew, and our antihero found
himself being in possession of the one thing harsh labour or coins can't
get you: friends. Some of these friends were already far more
experienced than he was, and our antihero learned a great deal from
those friends, knowledge he was happy to share with his less experienced
friends, or just the random passer-by in need of help.
As our antihero advanced through trying, talking and training, he joined
several guilds, the cook's guild, where he learned even more of the
fine kitchen, the mining guild, as he was capable in unearthing the ores
that mother nature hid so well, the crafting guild, for his fingers
ware adapt at cutting gems, the holy church of Saradomin, for our
antihero was a devoted worshipper, and even the champions guild, for
doing his fair share in making Runescape a better place.
He was also more appreciated by his growing number of friends, helping
out those in need, or just being a good friend, a listening ear and a
giver of advice.
Thus all went well, until in the end, one obstacle stood between our
antihero and his vision of the knight in blue: the dragon of Crandor
Isle.
The Dragon of Crandor Isle
 | ur
antihero had grown, learned and had made friends, but still, he had not
reached his goal: that prestigious blue armour called full rune. only
one obstacle remained between him and that goal: the dragon of Crandor
Isle.
Our antihero took up the quest to overcome this obstacle, to defeat the
dragon, so to reach his ultimate goal and to rid the world of this great
evil. |
His friend the Governor of Lumbridge gave him the "anti-dragon breath
shield" to help our friend come back in one piece, the champion's guild
provided the best equipment they could for this great undertaking, the
cook's guild chef personally prepared a good supply of nourishing fish
to go, the crafting guild made the best amulet they could, the assembled
monks of Saradomin prayed for success, the mining guild even threw in
some extra strength training. All this resulted in our antihero being as
ready as he would ever be.
So it was that our antihero boarded his ship, the "Lumbridge Lady" and
set sail to Crandor Isle. Captain Ned guided the ship well, not even a
freak storm, which nearly sank them, could stop Captain Ned from
reaching Crandor Isle. however, the fair Lumbridge Lady was to beaten up
to sail back home, so the only way out was in,
into the dank lair that was home to that evil creature, the Dragon.
After killing many evil creatures guarding their master of evil, our
antihero reached the dragon's lair, a few people there wished him luck,
and our antihero entered that dank lair.
He saw the dragon, uttered a last prayer to Saradomin and fearlessly
charged it, only to find a bloodstained, black, scarred dragonclaw
ripping through his intestines, and all went black...
Suddenly there was a light, and, after his eyes had adjusted to that
strange new sensation, a town appeared before him, a town dominated by a
grand castle...

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